BREAKING: Iran Inches Closer To Nuclear Weapons By Successfully Taking Apart A Microwave And Putting It Back Together

TEHRAN, IRAN - As tension between the United States and Iran continues to grow, the Islamic Republic inched closer to obtaining nuclear weapons on Thursday when its top engineers successfully took apart a microwave and put it back together. 

“Infidels, be warned!” Ayatollah Khamenei posted on X Thursday afternoon. “Today, the Holy Islamic Republic of Iran has taken a major leap forward in the race to develop a weapon that has the capability to destroy the world. Soon, we will show the pigs of the United States and European Union our power and send them back to the 1920s!”

For decades, Iran has kept the Western world on edge with the threat that they were in the process of developing nuclear weapons and planned to go scorched earth the moment they completed the task. But their understanding of nuclear technology surprised all when it was discovered that they had just learned about microwave technology. 

Following their microwave experiment, the Iranian Ministry of Defense and Armed Forces Logistics announced that the next phase of their path to nuclear proliferation includes completing the extremely difficult Millennium Falcon Lego set and developing a revolutionary new machine, which they plan to call the Va Cuum.

At press time, CIA intelligence reported that their “technological achievement” involved a Fisher-Price microwave play set.