New Orleans Deploys Elite Alligator Special Forces To Catch Remaining Escaped Inmates

NEW ORLEANS, LA - As the manhunt for six escaped prisoners continues, Mayor LaToya Cantrell announced early Tuesday that the city would be devoting more resources to catching the convicts by deploying the city’s elite Alligator SWAT Unit. 

“Thanks to the hard work of the New Orleans Police Department, we’ve successfully caught four of the ten escaped inmates,” Cantrell said in a press conference. “But now, we’re officially activating our highly trained and effective Alligator Special Forces to track down the remaining six suspects. As of this morning, government officials have started to drop pieces of raw chicken covered in the suspects' prison uniforms all across town to summon the alligators and give them a taste for these thugs.”

The New Orleans Alligator Special Forces has a strong track record when it comes to finding and apprehending wanted suspects. Unfortunately, few of those suspects are returned to local law enforcement alive as they’re chomped to bits almost immediately upon capture. 

According to the city, they’re still working on training the alligators not to eat the suspects but are having little success.  

At press time, New Orleans’ mosquitos slammed the Alligator Special Forces for threatening to interfere in their ongoing investigation of the case.